Twiztid - A Very Twiztid Christmas Lyrics
(featuring Blaze, Big Stank & Lil Poot)Alright, so let me get this right, you say it's a mother*****er who come to your house...To your mutha*****ing houseAnd he ain't be trying to rob you?Ah hell no, that's Santa Dawg, you ain't ever heard of Santa?Nuh uhSanta Claus, Saint Nick?NahKris Kringle?Man nah!You ain't ever heard of Kris Kringle?Man Hell nah!!Look (What?), he come down the chimney in some spots, but some people they ain't got nochimney, so he just come in tha back dooor, he may have to kick it in though, dependingit what hood he in, cause some people be bolting they shitWho?You know like Kwee-Kwee and them down there on west 7 mile, you know, swinginh the herbFool, I know who that is, who you talking about kicking in some DOORS?Santa, SANTA CLAUS!...Ho Ho Ho everybody's JollyOh, you mean the mother*****er who be ringing the bell down in front of Churches' ChickenSomething like that, except he come and he be bringing gifts, it's like religious thingor somethingMan, you acting like a sucker believing in that Fishtishish Bullshit!Man, I don't even like fish! so, LOOK!WHAT?He's looking at his listRightHe's checking it twiceRight, RightAnd he gonna know who's naughty or niceMan, hell nah, so what you saying, this mother*****er work for the FBI? he got a list,what kind of list?I mean, it's kinda like that,it ain't really a list like that,I mean its Christmas list,you know like gifts and stuff... remember when you was and you wanting Space Invadersfor the 5200 back in '86? (yea), and then nobody got it for you? (uh huh), cause youwasn't right, Santa was like ***** that, I ain't bringing him shit, I'mah gonna bring myhomie Lil Poot erythang.Well ***** SANTA, and ***** youMan ***** you man, you don't be dissing no Santa Claus, dawgI don't be beliving in that shit, that shit ain't even real, man you acting like alittle sucker beliving in some old Santa Claus shitMan, SANTA for life fool*have you been a good boy this year? if not I'm gonna split your *****ing head!"With so much Drama in the D-E-TIt's kinda hard putting trimin's on my Christmas TreeBut, I some how, some wayKeep coming up with fresh ass nizzle just to drizzle on the wayMay I, wrap another gift, so that I, can sneek up in your house in the bedroomEverybody tripping, roasting chestnuts, waiting on Santa to comeI got Blaze in the living room drinking Egg-NogJamie's in the kitchen and he pulling the bombI got Little Eric Loder dressed up like a ElfAnd, all they keep saying is "go ***** yourself"So, turn off the lights and close the doorsMan for what? Santa Claus HoeAnd, we gonna blow ounce with himG's up, hoes down, I got Santa Claus high as shitChorus:Sitting by the tree sipping Egg-Nog.Waiting on Christmas gifts....Egg-Nog.With my Mind on my presentsAnd my presents on my mindSitting by the tree sipping Egg-NogWaiting on Christmas gifts....Egg-NogWith my mind on my presentsAnd my presents on my mindMixing Egg-Nog and Gineverybody got their cups but they ain't chiped inWell I called up Blaze told him, time for dimeHe said him and Anybody coming through at nineSee everything is fine, cause I'm feeling all ChristmassyAnd I'm standing right next to the Christmas treeSeeing the blinking lights made me sickBut I always decorate every year for Saint NickSo, there ain't no chance he gonna pass me upGot some Cocoa in a cup and some Hydro in a bluntThat I am gonna smoke with Santa ClausGet him all shit-faced till the break of dawnAnd, watch him fly off in the nightHey thanks for the presents, I hope you make it home alrightBefore he left he said "Hey, Listen Bro""Your the first down by me, I gotta billon more to go".*Chorus*Later on Christmas DayMy homie Violent JCame through with a gift for meAnd a stoap ass fruit cake "aight dawg",With a phat ass joint with the blue cotsThat make ya choke, with some bud, ain't no chokeHad to take a step back, sit my Egg-Nog down, knocking Rum and cotI'm *****ed up now, but ain't no body clap, the presents are wrappedShaggy's style through with a 40 in a sac "roll it up"Smoke with Santa, break with the elvesThey supposed to stop by at a half past twelve*Chorus*Shit If I would of known we was getting shit for freeI would have pulled my dick out!
