Don Henley - If Dirt Were Dollars Lyrics
Walkin like a millionaireSmilin like a kingHe leaned his shopping cart against the wallHe said, I been a lot of placesAnd I seen a lot of thingsBut, sonny, I seen one thing that beats em allI was flyin back from lubbockI saw jesus on the plane...or maybe it was elvisYou know, they kinda look the sameHey, look out, junior, youre steppin on my bedI said, I dont see nothinHe just glared at me and said,If dirt were dollarsIf dirt were dollarsIf dirt were dollarsI wouldnt worry anymoreLookin like a beauty queenLoyal as a wifeShe raised her little voice and testified,I am a good girlIve been one all my lifeBut her virtue was as swollen as her prideShe shouldve had the oscarShe must have been miscastHer fifteen minutes went by so fastI said, now, baby, have you got no shame?She just looked at me, uncomprehendinglyLike cows at a passing trainIf dirt were dollarsIf dirt were dollarsIf dirt were dollarsI wouldnt worry anymoreWe got the bully pulpitAnd the poisoned penWe got a press no betterThan the public menThis brave new worldGone bad againGods finest little creaturesLooking brave and strongWhistling past the graveyardNothing can go wrongQuoting from the scripturesWith patriotic tearsWe got the same old menWith the same old fearsStanding at attentionWrapped in stars and stripesThey hear the phantom drummersAnd the nonexistent pipesThese days the buck stops nowhereNo one takes the blameBut evil is still evilIn anybodys nameIf dirt were dollarsIf dirt were dollarsIf dirt were dollarsWed all be in the black
